You're Trapped!

Even though I feel lucky and blessed... I wake up sometimes and think that 9 months from now, the baby will need me almost all of the time. I will go from having quite a lot of me-time to being the world to someone who depends on me for everything.

I'm trying not to get ahead of myself and I really want to enjoy this pregnancy, but I can't fool my brain into believing that the last couple of months aren't going to be uncomfortable. I remember all too well how difficult it was to sleep when the bump got bigger. I will it to be different this time. I will myself to be more patient and kinder to myself. I will myself to delegate more.

Deep breath.

Then I think about how quickly the first year passes... and before you know it they are out of nappies. And I remind myself that there is nothing to keep me from being creative once the baby is born. I can still write and be inventive.

It's going to be different this time... only I don't know how yet. Many unknowns for me to leave in the loving hands of the Goddess. I feel better already for having shared these thoughts. Hey, it's OK to be a bit freaked out about having your body hijacked!

My grandmothers feel close tonight - it's All Souls Night after all and I ask for their blessing on this new life. I think about generations of mothers and grandmothers with gratitude. May their wisdom not be lost. May we return to the ways of the Ancient One.

If I had only one wish tonight it would be for the insanity to stop... for patriarchy to die and for harmony to be restored.

Honouring the Feminine

As a woman I have been programmed not to trust my body. Patriarchy tells us that we as women should be ashamed of our monthly cycle. We should be ashamed of the feminine scent - apparently it is better to smell like strawberries than a real woman. We should suppress our reproductive system by adding chemically produced hormones that cause long term damage to our bodies.

As for pregnancy, we are told not to reveal that we are pregnant until it can no longer be hidden (three months is the 'socially acceptable' time to wait). Why? So that we won't be talking about a possible miscarriage later on? And God forbid that we mention having had an abortion or reveal the deep grief that goes with losing a baby at or right after birth!

If we are made to feel ashamed of all these natural bodily functions and occurrences, we are stripped of our Goddess power. In order to create true equality, we need to begin by honouring our bodies. By casting off the masks of shame.

Once we own the strength that comes from naturally flowing with our cycles and the initiatory power that comes from giving birth as well as grieving lost babies and failed pregnancies, we awaken to the power of our inner Goddess. The feminine body is the ultimate expression of the Goddess on this planet. We would all do well to listen to its messages.

Hail the Great Goddess who expresses Herself in each and every one of us! Blessed be! )O(